I will fall asleep like a cat today
At The repetitive sound
Your hand produces on the keyboard.
You are absorbed and isolated
Into the virtual world
Of the blue light
Of data and algorithms
And my efforts are childish
When passion is addiction.
Noise and broken sentences
Crawl in my mind
Worrying why the job I used to enjoy
Is now a reason off dark dreams and tears.
Have I seen a part of it that disgusts me?
Is it just this broken environment I am in?
Is it inside me? Is it the situation?
I reject the whole package
And my life gets impossible,
and gets on.
Your opinion is loud in your head
And will not rest
until it is shouted to those bosses.
The setting is absorbing the sounds
And the meeting proceeds
with no hype.
All are listening and pretending,
A few decide
On the apparent democracy.
Raising your voice is not welcome
And hiding your knowledge
behind a subtle question
might be your only expression.
Young woman with a sculptured character
You Prevent me from running blindly
Towards a mirage with a blurred profile
And from grabbing with direct hands my illusions.
You keep me connected
To the world of decisions and actions
Where perfection is unnecessary
And purposes are valuable.
A shoeless child runs through the fields
In a day that holds no promise.
Clouds are unwillingly gathering
And the green is starting to vanish.
My day reached its end
With few praises and many promises.
I know it is only for today
But this empty feeling cannot be stopped.
I am only bothered by your question marks
And your artificial doubts
That pose ridiculous installed on my way.
My voice is calm, my reason clear,
You will hear them
Until my coffee gets cold.
Protracted and diluted
Worth no valid reason,
Your words are losing their power
And you my respect.
Hide a void intention
I will not favour.
Make me a protein today
To express myself in all settings.
I wish for time to make me more resistant.
I demand the stability
In a simple watery situation.
I yearn to be hard-working
And fast reaching
While selecting my companions
For a perfect fit.
Hard life in they lab
Where hard materials and soft dreams
I don’t feel I deserve
Your pastel smiles and encouragement
When my data are a Pollock
And my protocol a rollercoaster.
Be there and keep quiet
To watch the show.
No plans, no agendas, no reminders
When work is curious
And colleagues are stimuli.
Targets are just bites for you
Who anxiously dreams how the whole cake will be
And how the story will end
Taken by a day-long search
For an explanation
To the behaviour of those pet molecules
It is easy to live like in a dream.
Floating over samples
And graphic statistics,
I breath only when the picture is in focus
And has defined borders.
I try not to Forget those little questions
That add corners and colour harmony
I move from one extreme to other
Picturing oxymoronic reality
To point the weak link
Of the theory.
Proceeding by extended
I make the interpretation idiot-proof
As a first stone for future steps.
I contract my muscles
Crunching over control
Of little Excel cells and tiny data points.
The scenario they picture
Is the natural reality
Or the translation of my expectations?
With a joyful papercup of Black tea in my hand
And a backpack of numbers and theories,
I travel through unseen possibilities and questions that hide treasure doors.