Like a blinded moth
I spin around in the middle air
Turning turning with no way to stop.
The excitement captured me
And I live the moment
With its silly giggles and ambitious prospects
For the future.
It is the right time to switch mode of action
And operate differently
Towards the others and your passion.
Control your hands and weigh the richness of their movements
Not to distract the ideas being born
After so much struggle.
A change of focus is recommended,
While envisioning the future
A celebration day is on the way
I just realised this is the magic moment
The routine is interrupted
By a sharp flash of white light.
This will take the form of a time-freeze
With nor targets nor expectations
Only daydreaming and absurdities.
Time flows slowly
While I read
And train myself to appreciate my reality
Of messy results
Looking for a logic
And persons I love
Trying to come closer.
Resting silent at the desk
I reconsider my choices
And my achievements,
Little cobble stones
On a path with no clear destination.
After the curve, behind the hill,
A scene is forming
And slowly coming into focus.
The future planned, the topic is chosen,
And still there details of everyday drain you
With their burocracy, their demand for funding,
taking away the passion that brought you to the bench
In the lab.
Heavy eyes and slow thinking
Are a thick fog wall I have to break
to start the day.
No energy left for a smile or free support
In this busy lab.
A manuscript is sent
And the waiting begins
Until the judgment is transformed
In lessons for the authors
And the discoveries are sent
To the world
Like tiny helping hands.
Blue skies above and spiky roses below
Accompany my thinking
And drift towards a future
Of renewal and fireworks.
Giant and buffing the monster has me
Again at the door of the achievement.
His presence fills my room
And lays imperfections on my slides
Of no importance
While others breath freedom.
Tapping on the floor
I pace the value of my time
And train my patience.
External observers can judge my work
And evaluate my knowledge
Like a rough diamond under the lens
But no eye can know it all.
Internally distracted by an espresso
I live intensity and frustration
In the same instant.
The high tide of energy will pass
Leaving a human and restless
Managing of time and ambition.
Everybody laughs and dies a bit inside
Thanks to your loud senseless sexist humor.
Many makes can stupidity have
Yours is comedy,
The lowest one
With no imagination or word game.
An airy circle will form
Amber I will watch it.
My brain figuratively sits
On a wooden chair in the back of my head
And stares around
To acknowledge the reality and the dynamics
In front of its feet.
Relaxation comes, as energy at a minimum
Is necessary during the day.
When the fear sets in
Reasoning is a far weak flame
Fighting timid to set a luminous fire
To restore control and confidence.
Patience and focus are rewarded.
Hypnotized by the changing lights
I forget this is a meeting
And dream of northern lights
And traveling north
to the land where I am asexual
And my words build my credibility.
The blank manuscript on front of me
Initiate my travel to the zone
Of connections with no turns
And statistical facts with hidden fascinations.
In a line they arrange,
And the tale of this manuscript
To project quantitative results
In the light of passion
And scientific curiosity.
Go far and you will find
Your question mark
Adrenaline and fear will rush
While your steps will start
To be longer and longer
For a closer and closer
Destination of clarity.