Love is green
And grows unattended
Between your pinky toes.
Soft and flexible
You do not notice it
Still enjoy its silent support.
Years have passed
Studies have been completed,
Or only new?
Love is green
And grows unattended
Between your pinky toes.
Soft and flexible
You do not notice it
Still enjoy its silent support.
Years have passed
Studies have been completed,
Or only new?
My arms are crossed
And my thoughts far away
When the bell rings.
The day is over
Or does it start?
I head home and fill the last hours
With tenderness and personality
Until the sleep comes
And my heart holds a list
With minute-long experiences and small memories.
It has a warm price
The recognition of your work by a friend.
Work talks stay at work
And the focus is down to that stained bench
That stores your weapons and your solutions.
Everyday leads me on a treasure hunt
With hints hidden below a coffee cup
And inside an orange.
I zigzag absent-minded while other proceed
Bloody on their metallic rigid tracks.
Resting at last, with my constellation
of secret places And my hands full
And sweaty.
I know you are connected to my heart
Even miles from here
And on another country.
Surrounded by factories,
You can feel my call,
When the routine gets boring
And the heart heavy.
Noise and broken sentences
Crawl in my mind
Worrying why the job I used to enjoy
Is now a reason off dark dreams and tears.
Have I seen a part of it that disgusts me?
Is it just this broken environment I am in?
Is it inside me? Is it the situation?
I reject the whole package
And my life gets impossible,
and gets on.
Numbers in the table,
Like kids holding hands in a line,
Show me the direction
While tickling my brain
In this hide-and-seek game.
The pull and magic of the hidden trend
Make me a solo artist
Behind the curtain of an unapologetic stage.
My lips cannot pronounce
The impact of these numbers
But only imagine it and suggest it
With metaphors and little confidence.
Numbers talk to me
And they swirl into a portray of our future
That hardly graphics can describe.
Hard life in they lab
Where hard materials and soft dreams
are tested
I don’t feel I deserve
Your pastel smiles and encouragement
When my data are a Pollock
And my protocol a rollercoaster.
Be there and keep quiet
To watch the show.
I contract my muscles
Crunching over control
Of little Excel cells and tiny data points.
The scenario they picture
Is the natural reality
Or the translation of my expectations?
With a joyful papercup of Black tea in my hand
And a backpack of numbers and theories,
I travel through unseen possibilities and questions that hide treasure doors.
Another day has passed
Through my clicks and my printings
In the busy lab
Who looks forward.
Lab animals feed on planning the future
And snack on tiny bites of promising mistakes
While the mission proceeds.
The illusion of organization
Is fooling us
On our benches, in our offices,
In our freezer.
The uncontrollable magic happens
When the light is switched off and the drawer closed.
Our proteins in their tubes
Initiate the revolution
Out of our sight, behind our back
And subvert the order we imposed
To samples supposed to respond to our command
And follow our hypotheses.
The geometric rationally organized drawer
Is each night the land of anarchy
And the cause of headaches and endless hunts
In the morning.
A stream of endorfins
Sweeps me away
When I glance the results.
Enough to make the day
Precious
Although at the first step
Of the longest stairs.
Career and life.
Shiny as polished
Glassware waits for me
And the colourful protein solutions
Of today.
Swimming and swirling
In their soup
Proteins arrange and interact
Like people in crowded squares
Showing uncontrollable attraction.
Research Planning is forecasting
What shines on that crucial moment
When your hands start moving
And your mind keeps quiet
For once
To follow the steps of the protocol
You wrote.
Great ideas do not need justifications
In an ideal world
We belong to,
But too far away
From the research world.
Pro and cons of my possible next brilliant step
Crowd my head
While I have to invent also
The next ideal justification.
Details are in the corners
And in the last strokes of the brush
To complete the aquarello
When nobody is watching.
Sitting at the desk
The many experiments transform
Fusing in a single story
Whose last slow details
Make me feel unique.
Polka dots and stars
Start to decorate my labbooks
And cheer up days full of expectation
Until the holidays
And the final answer that only repetitions can confirm.
Dynamic yet scared
I jump from challenge to adventure
Hiding my motus
And escaping in silence
Buy still reaching my love and my passion.
I look forward
And start the Xmas tree
Two months in advance.
Being prepared is crucial
To give and obtain the most in difficult situations.
I prepare.
Silence bores me
And leaves a taste of wasted life.
Not paying attention
Makes my brain angry.
Agreeing for no reason
Sets my years of education on fire. Patience is not my thing.
I won’t listen to you
You that use the tactic of silence to win me over
To make your point with no argument.
You will not ridicule my preparation and my solid ground.
I will scream my reasons
And list my points.
The war is not over.
I am deaf
To the complains of the lazy
Who do not see beyond their nose.
I am deaf
To the laughter of the bully who hides insecurity behind bad jokes.
But I am not blind.
I listen to the marvelous details of politics and cars
While I warm up with a coffee
Sitting and listening.
Day after day this is the taste of my coffee
That would be sweeter
If handcrafts and holidays were the topic.
Patience is the unreachable
Holy grail
At the end of the project.
When you have it at your belt
Every obstacle is a small bump
On the road to the entertainment
Only life can provide.
Mixing and stirring
I introduce chaos and
I pace the event
To give the world a new solution
And a stepping stone to this long experiment.
Boiling and l laughing inside
I wait hopeful for the special person
That delivers results and analyses
And sip from this cup
Of bitterness and time management.
Time flows slowly
While I read
And train myself to appreciate my reality
Of messy results
Looking for a logic
And persons I love
Trying to come closer.
Organizing a meeting
and fearing its waiting,
Its notes, its pauses,
And my duty to speak
Of minimal details assuming monstrous importance
While life goes by.
A General uneasiness takes me
In this situation of peace and boredom
But the reason is unknown
And the real laughter is hiding still.
A manuscript is sent
And the waiting begins
For months
Until the judgment is transformed
In lessons for the authors
And the discoveries are sent
To the world
Like tiny helping hands.
Google gives me answers,
My colleague gives me a smile,
Anytime
A hug is always on the way
From the ones we love.
This quick society cracked it.
The candid dove of experimental design flies in
And shows to all the way
To elegance and beauty
Of working in the lab
everyday.
Blue skies above and spiky roses below
Accompany my thinking
Everyday
And drift towards a future
Of renewal and fireworks.
At the end of the table
The wise sits in silence
Observing and staring
Those who nervously run
And show their plumage.
The train stopped
And the steps downwards made me an explorer,
Alone and fit in this stranger city
Of binding rushing active
my self-appreciation returned
And my accidents claimed their size
Made of insecure steps, bravery, and hidden years.
Giant and buffing the monster has me
Again at the door of the achievement.
His presence fills my room
And lays imperfections on my slides
Of no importance
While others breath freedom.
Tapping on the floor
I pace the value of my time
And train my patience.
External observers can judge my work
And evaluate my knowledge
Like a rough diamond under the lens
But no eye can know it all.
Everything is possible
Yet the way had to be chosen
Based on a idealized arrival city.
Flipping a coin or following the heart
Are equal when the attitude decides
If it will reason or shine sun.
Curiosity killed the cat
And the researcher who bravely
Made long term plans
Seeking explanations to a phenomenon.
The three year long project killed the curiosity.
Oscillating masts
Remind me the turbulence
of the daily life
When holding to the surface
Pushes you forward
And keeps your eyes on the horizon.
Chin up and looking far
I direct my slow first step.
Shaky for fear but confident and hopeful
It happens
And the situation has already changed.
Don’t think, just move.
My inner valley is crowded
Of angry and righteous echoes
But no exit is found
And the energy builds up
To feed stubbornness and mental rollercoasters.
The exit is found and the gate is open
Over a profound burst of power.
Caught up by the lab turmoil
I end up in situations I can’t control
And do not realize.
Taken by surprise
Rapidly search for my thin shield
When a sword would be my choice.
Everybody laughs and dies a bit inside
Thanks to your loud senseless sexist humor.
Many makes can stupidity have
Yours is comedy,
The lowest one
With no imagination or word game.
An airy circle will form
Around you
Amber I will watch it.
When the fear sets in
Reasoning is a far weak flame
Fighting timid to set a luminous fire
To restore control and confidence.
Patience and focus are rewarded.
Hypnotized by the changing lights
I forget this is a meeting
And dream of northern lights
And traveling north
to the land where I am asexual
And my words build my credibility.
Pretty of scientific doubts
I lie thoughtless in the office,
Where are my results?
Are they meaningful?
Imaging reviews and critical questions,
My whole theory collapses
in fear and awe
While doubting myself.
Go far and you will find
Your question mark
To haunt.
Adrenaline and fear will rush
While your steps will start
To be longer and longer
For a closer and closer
Destination of clarity.
Flowers and light in a ray
decorate my corner
bringing life in an office of intensity and cramps.
Learning the antique art
of pronouncing monosyllables
I forecast a bright future and move the first step