Regular and precise
Like a shiny Salt Crystal
Feel the changes in the air around me.
Melting away I let my energy spread
While strongly I hold on to the skills and ideas
Hiding inside but not vanishing.
Noise and broken sentences
Crawl in my mind
Worrying why the job I used to enjoy
Is now a reason off dark dreams and tears.
Have I seen a part of it that disgusts me?
Is it just this broken environment I am in?
Is it inside me? Is it the situation?
I reject the whole package
And my life gets impossible,
and gets on.
The invisible fragments
Swim free in pure sterile water
Ready for the magic.
The monstrous plasmid is coming
and the reaction will start
Hot, agitated, repetitive.
A single mutation will change the course of the experiment.
A tiny step of in vitro evolution.
Words come out and silence enters
liberating the energy and welcoming the confidence.
Public speaking is a walk
in the land of thorns and poppy seeds.
Your journey begins, the andrenalin fuels you
warm hands reassure you.
I see yellow, you say green
shedding doubts over reason and logic.
Trust yourself and look straigth,
you will not fool yourself again
by wasting time for unrealistic hypothesis
that undermine you
and your mind.
Wave on wave
The disruption comes
In seconds or instants
Under my eyes.
Control over it is just fool
And no time is left
The few milliliters that make a difference
Make me realize of the importance
of moments and gestures.
Richness and purpose
Can hide in the drops
You don’t consider.
My heart in my throat
Tells me a danger is at the door
And this warning sign
Shines a blue light over me.
Cold and anxious I wait
For My destiny to come
While meditating and wondering
about my role and power.
Temptation comes in many forms.
A coffee smell on the bus to work,
A red tomato colour at lunch time
And a crisp chocolate snap after dinner
All text your strength and your determination
In a material world.
Commas and digits describe my day
Typing and aligning
Tasks of different value.
Tasks to connect dots
That take me forward
And draw the borders of tomorrow.
At My desk I protect myself
With a broad screen and massive keyboard
But crazy ideas and hurry penetrate
Just to make me enjoy my coffee more.
My mind drives away
while results and errors are projected
connceting the points of a young scientific career.
A spark strikes and I can help,
the day is rich.
Heat flashes and palpitations,
Sweaty palms and anger,
Is it menopause or group meeting?
The extremities of biology
Summarize the extreme of human dynamics.
A Low Energy transfer
Of projects and results
Streams through the lab
Engulfing the ideas at the benches.
It has reached now its maximum
And bloomed in a rich
And vibrant plan
For the most elegant experiment.
Under pressure we remove
The bacteria that harm our experiment
For the coming investigation.
A whisper tells me
the solutions address ready
For hosting the mutant cells
And trigger the fluorescence.
My kcat lingers today
And an extra effort is needed to reach the bus
Under the intense rain.
I will reach out for distractions
And unavailable hugs.
Like in a movie,
Bad news and waterdrops holds hands
Waiting for time to pass.
Work seems from a challenging hobby,
A hunt for a treasure few have seen.
The treasure is a sealed bottle
Lying under nitrogen in a closed hood
With no label.
Only the brave will reach it
And recognize its value,
And break the seal.
Stand up and go
Your idea is leading you.
You will figures out the steps
Under the light of excitement
Day by day.
The question that woke you up
Will come back in your head
And hunt you
Until you can reach the full stop.
This is the fun and the essence of research.
Alone in silence
I stare at my samples
All lined up and ready to prove themselves
Like little timid soldiers.
Here is the trumpet, with its sharp and energetic sound
And here are the soldiers
Running blindly to their position.
As a human chain, they are the steps
Making the golden path
That leads to an undiscovered forest.
Holding the worst of my pens,
a rush of adrenalin takes me
and the craziest of the experiments is designed.
Steps are simplified,
and pride in the elegance of the solution fills me
and brings a timid smile to my lips,
Has anybody seen me?
They will see the manuscript.
Planning of mutations
Brings me back to childhood and playing with Lego.
Will this small brick be able to support the castle?
Will this extra arginine pimp this enzyme?
Mutagenesis plays by the rules of nature
And smiles at evolution,
Embarrassed by its small efforts
Towards lab-scale successes.
The DNA is a evanescent drop
Of a water-like liquid
At the top of the eppy.
Stubborn and robust
It can stand there and watch the ages pass.
A minuscule change today
will change its meaning
Will give it a new purpose and a new life.
Possibilities are open once small changes are made.
Letter by letter
I label the tubes with my precious DNA
And stare and my young fingers
That jump and dance
With click click and uh uh.
Popping eppies brings a laugh
to the girls in the lab
tip tapping by the centrifuge.
Research means being surrounded
by dozens of smart active people
That invade your territory
Behind your bench, your shaker, your drawer.
They constantly also invade your mind
Your assumptions, your projections, your life.
Growing with your experiments
You leave the door open to being changed
and to evolve into an adult
and intro a doctor at the same time.
You can do it I in a blink,
Well and structured you can perform.
Your body however tells you no.
You mind will like it, it is a certain ego booster
But your inside is tired and wants a deeper reason
A social value and human contact.
What to choose? What is better?
You are not ready to say it out loud,
Waiting for that moment.
Tip tip tip
Eppy Eppy Eppy
The sounds of a good day in the lab.
I fold and bend
Adapting to your wishes
Changing my project to for your strategy
Suggesting your strategy to for my project.
A swan, a rose, a snake
I transform and lose myself
Where did I go? Who am I?
You don’t care and I have to transform for a last time to be myself.
Innovation is bitter and painful like acupuncture
But surprises you on your way
Bringing sunlight and excitement.
Imaging the many roads opening at your feet
And your first check
Adds a brilliant nuance to the repetitive
Mindless work in front of you today.
Doubts and dream taste the same today.
Behind my screen
A little red-haired girl sits and calculates
The results of a decisive experiment.
Little smiles appear sometimes
together with the fast movements
of her hand.
An hectic Typing tells me she likes the risk
Of a complex high-potential experiment
And already tastes the sweet flavor of discovery.
The story is finally here,
the results align and indicate the direction,
I will follow it with my research and my life.
Fearless and shy, proud and blushing,
my door is opening.
I curiously stare the shiny bottles and the silver spoons
that on my bench eagerly lie.
Alone in the lab I wonder my future and my decisions,
everybody says I can do it,
I want to believe it for myself,
for my tomorrows,
for a easier life one day.
I thus push myself every single day
say yes when a no is reasonable
and lend a hand when tired I dream of home.