We all share passions
And eyes looking forward
Although staring at personal shiny targets.
We all share goosebumps
When the future is a tunnel
And its length unknown.
We all share a special hug
That keeps us warm when loneliness strikes.
We will all share our special talent
And hold on.
In the rain,
The road is clear
and the future seems harmless.
Walking alone does not scare me
If the drops sound steadily behind me.
This wet darkness is comfortable
And hugs me all the way home.
My eyes have become lazy
Scrutinizing the day
for a glimpse of the future.
Active streams and imaginary flights
It is a hard job with sweaty palms
bringing the lost stream
To an inner silent spring.
I trained myself not to believe you
And to double-guess your messages
Fearing for my self-esteem and my future.
I finally have this skill
At my belt
But constant exercise is a must
As generosity is my instinct.
Lost in the books
Swimming through the pages
Breathing my notes
I oxygenate the mind
To draw the contour of a future experiment
And isolate the daily adventures to give it life.
I look forward
And start the Xmas tree
Two months in advance.
Being prepared is crucial
To give and obtain the most in difficult situations.
Silence bores me
And leaves a taste of wasted life.
Not paying attention
Makes my brain angry.
Agreeing for no reason
Sets my years of education on fire. Patience is not my thing.
I won’t listen to you
You that use the tactic of silence to win me over
To make your point with no argument.
You will not ridicule my preparation and my solid ground.
I will scream my reasons
And list my points.
The war is not over.
I am deaf
To the complains of the lazy
Who do not see beyond their nose.
I am deaf
To the laughter of the bully who hides insecurity behind bad jokes.
But I am not blind.
Holding my shoulders tight
In the foggy late evening
I look behind
And every little act seems far
Yet crucial and painful.
The bonus ahead promises a rollercoaster
Of laughters and jumps forwards
To write a new chapter.
On Monday, you start slow
you sit at your desk and think
where to put your time
and your attention
not to lose the smile of the weekend.
Patience is the unreachable
At the end of the project.
When you have it at your belt
Every obstacle is a small bump
On the road to the entertainment
Only life can provide.
Resting silent at the desk
I reconsider my choices
And my achievements,
Little cobble stones
On a path with no clear destination.
After the curve, behind the hill,
A scene is forming
And slowly coming into focus.
A General uneasiness takes me
In this situation of peace and boredom
But the reason is unknown
And the real laughter is hiding still.
A manuscript is sent
And the waiting begins
Until the judgment is transformed
In lessons for the authors
And the discoveries are sent
To the world
Like tiny helping hands.
Task after task
The boredom sets in,
The brain struggles
And the mind goes on strike.
The headache jumps up as an indicator of personal inutility
And a push to identify our passions
And our true colours.
Signs of age, symptoms of the changing time
Recur unexpected through my day
Shedding a cold perspective
On my actions and reality
I cannot always see.
The candid dove of experimental design flies in
And shows to all the way
To elegance and beauty
Of working in the lab
Blue skies above and spiky roses below
Accompany my thinking
And drift towards a future
Of renewal and fireworks.
At the end of the table
The wise sits in silence
Observing and staring
Those who nervously run
And show their plumage.
The train stopped
And the steps downwards made me an explorer,
Alone and fit in this stranger city
Of binding rushing active
my self-appreciation returned
And my accidents claimed their size
Made of insecure steps, bravery, and hidden years.
Giant and buffing the monster has me
Again at the door of the achievement.
His presence fills my room
And lays imperfections on my slides
Of no importance
While others breath freedom.
Tapping on the floor
I pace the value of my time
And train my patience.
External observers can judge my work
And evaluate my knowledge
Like a rough diamond under the lens
But no eye can know it all.
Curiosity killed the cat
And the researcher who bravely
Made long term plans
Seeking explanations to a phenomenon.
The three year long project killed the curiosity.
Sinking or floating
Are options always available
That I ignore as no conscious change
Hides the thrill of a surprise
When Looking back to the past road.
Warmed up and restored
My work is paced by steamy cups
That Embellish intervals of expectation
For the next step.
My inner valley is crowded
Of angry and righteous echoes
But no exit is found
And the energy builds up
To feed stubbornness and mental rollercoasters.
The exit is found and the gate is open
Over a profound burst of power.
Caught up by the lab turmoil
I end up in situations I can’t control
And do not realize.
Taken by surprise
Rapidly search for my thin shield
When a sword would be my choice.
Everybody laughs and dies a bit inside
Thanks to your loud senseless sexist humor.
Many makes can stupidity have
Yours is comedy,
The lowest one
With no imagination or word game.
An airy circle will form
Amber I will watch it.
When the fear sets in
Reasoning is a far weak flame
Fighting timid to set a luminous fire
To restore control and confidence.
Patience and focus are rewarded.
Hypnotized by the changing lights
I forget this is a meeting
And dream of northern lights
And traveling north
to the land where I am asexual
And my words build my credibility.
Pretty of scientific doubts
I lie thoughtless in the office,
Where are my results?
Are they meaningful?
Imaging reviews and critical questions,
My whole theory collapses
in fear and awe
While doubting myself.
Go far and you will find
Your question mark
Adrenaline and fear will rush
While your steps will start
To be longer and longer
For a closer and closer
Destination of clarity.
Flowers and light in a ray
decorate my corner
bringing life in an office of intensity and cramps.
Learning the antique art
of pronouncing monosyllables
I forecast a bright future and move the first step
Pink and purple
will invest my office like a breeze
or warmth and freespeech.
Innovation starts by doing things differently
and no greyzone is allowed
in my timid heart and brave mind.
Words come out and silence enters
liberating the energy and welcoming the confidence.
Public speaking is a walk
in the land of thorns and poppy seeds.
Your journey begins, the andrenalin fuels you
warm hands reassure you.